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Category Archives: World

Canada Expedites Construction of Wall Along US Border

March 3, 2016by Sal Kingfisher 1 Comment

OTTAWA, Ontario–As the country prepares to deal with a major influx of illegal immigrants, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced today that the government has issued an order in council […]

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World

Cannibal Regales Tribe with Wondrous Tales of Skyscrapers, Michael Moore Following U.S. Visit

May 16, 2015by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

PAPUA NEW GUINEA–Upon returning from a recent trip to the United States, Hupy, a Korowai tribesman, attempted to relate to his friends and family many of the wonders he experienced.  […]

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World

Putin Vows to Increase Bench-Press by 20% Over Next 12 Months

March 4, 2015by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

MOSCOW–President Vladimir Putin today informed Russian Federal Assembly members his intended plan to increase the presidential maximum bench press by up to 20% over the next year.  Putin outlined a […]

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World

ISIS Signs #1 Ranked Terrorist Recruiting Class

March 4, 2015by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

Recent recruiting trip AR-RAQQAH, Syria–For the third straight year ISIS has emerged after terrorist signing day with the top ranked class in the world, according to several terrorist ranking services.  […]

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World

Suicide Bomber Worried He May Have Left Oven On

January 12, 2015by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

TEL AVIV–Khalid Farsoun, a 22 year-old Palestinian student, is currently sitting at a downtown bus stop wearing a bomb vest underneath his vintage Members Only jacket.  The sociology major was […]

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World

Phone Talks Between Obama and Putin Go Nowhere Due to Unforeseen Language Barrier

December 22, 2014by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

WASHINGTON, D.C.–Phone talks between President Barack Obama and Russian President Vladimir Putin broke down when the two leaders discovered that they were completely unable to understand one another. Obama made […]

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World

Elf on a Shelf Embedded with ISIS Files Scathing Report

December 22, 2014by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

Willie has had a hard time dealing with the experience NORTH POLE–Nervous and withdrawn, Willie, an Elf on a Shelf who was assigned to watch and report on the behavior […]

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World

Kim Jong Un Talks Relationships, Sony Hackers

December 17, 2014by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

Democratic People’s Republic of Korea (North Korea) Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un sat down with BWN foreign correspondent Stark Majors for a rare interview to discuss a range of topics, […]

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World

ISIS Releases Video Defending Bill Cosby

December 8, 2014by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

SAMARRA, Iraq–In a new video posted to an ISIS social media account, ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-baghdadi summarized the militant group’s victories in 2014 and outlined the schedule for the […]

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World

Nike Legally Adopts Thousands of Undocumented Immigrant Children

July 26, 2014by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

These newly adopted boys enjoy some arts and crafts time BEAVERTON, Oregon–Nike, one of the world’s largest shoe and apparel makers, has also proven that it possesses one of the […]

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World

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  • Texas Governor Suggests Abortion Could Gain Support if it Were Performed by Shooting the Fetus
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  • "Exploding Arm Syndrome" Completely Unrelated to COVID-19 Vaccine, says Pfizer Rep
  • Texas Pushes to Outlaw All Abortions Except in Cases Where Fetus Poses Threat to Mother and Father

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