After Thanksgiving, Family Agrees to Meet Again When Grandma Dies
If the stuffing doesn’t kill her now LINCOLN, NE–Over the past several years, the Luther family has seen its once-huge gatherings become ever smaller. A decade ago, it was not […]
Monthly Archives: November 2013
JFK Assassination Re-enactment Highlight of Dallas 50th Anniversary Celebration
JFK impersonator Lance Kendrick has waited years for this day DALLAS–As the festivities surrounding the 50th anniversary of the assassination of President John F. Kennedy came to a close, 150 […]
Police Warn Watching Charlie Sheen Sex Tape Will Kill the Viewer in Seven Days
Just standing near Sheen has been proven to cause meth addiction HOLLYWOOD–Police have taken to social media and the internet, along with more traditional means such as television and newspapers, […]
Pardoned Thanksgiving Turkey Sought in Quadruple Homicide Investigation
Photo of the suspect WASHINGTON, D.C.–A two year-old Narragansett turkey is being described by police as the primary suspect in a quadruple homicide in Rock Creek Park. The victims, two […]
Adam Levine First Transgender to be Named Sexiest Man Alive by People Magazine
Levine was also named Sexiest Man Alive by Homeless Weekly HOLLYWOOD–People Magazine is being lauded by members of the LGBT community following the announcement of Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine […]
This Day in History: 99 Years Ago Steamroll Jenkins, The NFL’s First Black Player, Rushed for 897 Yards and 16 TDs Against the Chicago Bears
Jenkins wasn’t allowed headgear, and opposing teams were allowed to fire shotguns at him November 12, 1920–When the Chicago Bears ran on to their home field on that windy day […]
Death Toll From Crimson Tide Coach Nick Saban’s Weekly Press Conference Now at Three
Saban counts the number of reporters he’s killed TUSCALOOSA, AL–James Cale, a beat reporter for the Birmingham Daily Press, has died from injuries he sustained Monday during Alabama Crimson Tide […]
Study Finds Mid-East Hatred of America Mostly Focused on Rhode Island Man
Death to America! Especially to Ralph Morgan! WASHINGTON D.C.–In a joint study conducted by the Arab American Institute and the Central Intelligence Agency, researchers have discovered that the majority of […]
