LAS VEGAS–Fox News anchor Chris Wallace opened last night’s final presidential debate as moderator by reminding GOP nominee Donald Trump to stay on topic, keep his answers short and respectful, […]
TORONTO–National Hockey League Hall of Fame Chairman Wayne Gretzky announced today that the 2016 class would include, alongside legendary hockey player Wayne Gretzky, Major League Baseball’s all time hits leader […]
NEW YORK CITY–In an apparent attempt to appeal to both Republican and Democratic voters, GOP Presidential Nominee Donald Trump today clarified his stance on abortion. “Abortion is wrong–period. I’ve been […]
WASHINGTON D.C.—In an effort to defuse growing hostilities between the law enforcement community and African Americans, today the nation’s highest ranking police official announced a plan to increase the number […]
WACO, Texas—According to multiple sources, Mark Dodson, a junior at David Koresh High School, is the sole boy in his class who has yet to lose his virginity to Sandra […]
AMERICA–Men across the nation have rallied together to demand that transgender people who have male genitalia come on into the men’s room with them, like God intended. “Is that a […]
OKLAHOMA CITY–A proposed new Oklahoma state law is under attack by women’s rights groups who argue that it will make it more difficult for a woman to choose to have an […]
Living proof BOSTON, Massachusetts–Legendary children’s entertainer Frosty “The Snowman” Goldstein testified before congress today on the subject of climate change. The former actor, who gained fame in the 1960s with […]
WASHINGTON, D.C.–The U.S. Senate narrowly passed a bill to change the pronunciation of the letter W. Traditionally pronounced ‘double-you’, the new pronunciation, should the president sign the bill into law, […]
WASHINGTON, D.C.–Senator John McCain (R-AZ), the chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee, announced today the formation of a subcommittee to investigate the various plot-holes, coincidences and lack of originality […]
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