Defiant Kristi Noem Tears Head off Kitten During Press Conference
PIERRE, South Dakota — South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem apparently doubled-down on her image as a tough as nails country woman earlier today when she stood in front of the […]
Category Archives: Politics
Trump: Abortion OK Only When Made to Look Like Miscarriage
NEW YORK CITY–In an apparent attempt to appeal to both Republican and Democratic voters, GOP Presidential Nominee Donald Trump today clarified his stance on abortion. “Abortion is wrong–period. I’ve […]
Texas Governor Suggests Abortion Could Gain Support if it Were Performed by Shooting the Fetus
AUSTIN, Texas—Earlier today Texas governor Greg Abbott told reporters he believes the state could easily change its wholesale opposition to abortion if there were a way to complete the procedure […]
BWN Exclusive: Interview with Donald Trump and Excerpt from his Upcoming Memoir, Trump Change: The Greatest Presidency of All Time
We spoke with former President Donald Trump about his legacy, life after the presidency, and his soon to be released fictional memoir, Trump Change: The Greatest Presidency of all Time. […]
Debate Moderator Reminds Trump to Keep Answers On Topic, Hands off Hillary’s Pussy
LAS VEGAS–Fox News anchor Chris Wallace opened last night’s final presidential debate as moderator by reminding GOP nominee Donald Trump to stay on topic, keep his answers short and respectful, […]
First Stage of Gitmo Shutdown to Affect Nightclubs, Waterpark
GUANTANAMO BAY, Cuba—Critics of President Barack Obama’s inaction on his long-promised plan to close the federal detention center here were overjoyed at the news last week that the prison, commonly […]
Congress Passes Bill Changing Pronunciation of W
WASHINGTON, D.C.–The U.S. Senate narrowly passed a bill to change the pronunciation of the letter W. Traditionally pronounced ‘double-you’, the new pronunciation, should the president sign the bill into law, […]
Senate Convenes Subcommittee to Investigate Star Wars The Force Awakens Plot-Holes
WASHINGTON, D.C.–Senator John McCain (R-AZ), the chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee, announced today the formation of a subcommittee to investigate the various plot-holes, coincidences and lack of originality […]
Embarrassed Obama Unable to Correctly Recall Number of Americans He’s Had Killed
WASHINGTON, D.C.–President Barack Obama drew laughter today when he became embarrassed after forgetting the exact number of successful drone strikes he’s ordered against American citizens. “Thirty-one? Wait, no, thirty-two, I […]
Former Aide Claims Trump Campaign a Wacky Scheme to Collect Inheritance from Rich Uncle
NEW YORK CITY–Tom Jennings, a former aide to Donald Trump, claims he was fired from the GOP presidential candidate’s campaign because he failed to lose enough money. But that’s not […]
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