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Tag Archives: CDC

“Exploding Arm Syndrome” Completely Unrelated to COVID-19 Vaccine, says Pfizer Rep

March 10, 2021by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

NEW YORK–Following the latest incident in which a man’s arm exploded into a cloud of red mist immediately after receiving his second dose of the Pfizer COVID-19 vaccine, Dawn Wells, […]

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Health

CDC Computer Model Suggests Entire Town of Mayberry would have Succumbed to COVID-19

February 7, 2021by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

(ATLANTA, GA)–Dr. Inger Damon with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention announced earlier today that recent computer models warn of a new surge of COVID-19 variants, and that if […]

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US

Fucking Pussy Dies of Bird Flu

June 20, 2015by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

Newport, Rhode Island–Dave Mariucci, a 26 year-old software engineer, died Friday, only one day after being diagnosed with avian influenza, commonly known as bird flu.  Sources close to Mariucci say […]

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Health

Man Cries Foul After Buying Ebola Suit Made From Ebola

October 18, 2014by Sal Kingfisher Leave a comment

Personalized apron included BROOK CITY, Louisiana–David Canter thought he had a sure-fire legal case against Turnco Products.  But that was before he read the fine print.  The 35 year-old freelance […]

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Health

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